On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
