I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Im part way to drunk.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
