I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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