How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
