I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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