its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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