Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize