I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
the liver wants what the liver wants
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
