just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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