Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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