my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
We were destined to go to rehab together
We're not piercing ourselves today.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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