I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
