hell yes lets make some ravioli
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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