That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
