we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
But we have bathrooms and they dont
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize