Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize