oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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