we're blogging at a bar
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
