He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
