You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
