I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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