I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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