Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
