Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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