the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I lost the right to judge tonight
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
