We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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