i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
