i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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