i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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