A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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