all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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