How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
