So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
