He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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