Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
