You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I enjoy the company of your penis
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
