I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
