if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
