should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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