so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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