Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just sucked dick on a ferry
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize