yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
