I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
