you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
