I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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