At least make sure they are 18
Why
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Randomize
