i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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