Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
