Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
