in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
